Byte-sized stories

Today I woke up thinking it was going to be different, a new day, a new experience. My expectations were high from the start, which can be sometimes great, bringing new energy and new insights, however, sometimes it can bring demise to smaller successes.. as they may seem that they worth nothing compared to the expectations. This is a topic to discuss with a therapist, I suppose. Regardless, the day started off with a new, unfound ‘vibe’. It felt like, all of the sudden, there was colour in a grey world, warmth in a cold room and smiles on stoic faces. I woke up, took my morning coffee, of course, decaf, as health is becoming an increasingly complicated matter these days, and decided to take a stroll on the nearby market, look at people and take in the atmosphere.

The market building itself, is a colourful and stylistically mixed structure, looking as if multiple people with different ideas started building it. So this market is not a beautiful place, but it is spacious and welcoming. From early in the morning, various traders of fruits, vegetables and meat, flock to the market to occupy their designated spots. Buyers from various age groups, but mainly elderly people gather to buy fresh produce, particularly during the week. As today is a Monday, it feels rather unusual for me to be here, as if it is a hidden reality which I can get a glimpse into only today. As I enter the building and realise that people are all over the place, running around like ants gathering food, it feels almost like I am participating in something secret, something exceptional, on a Monday morning, when usually office drones, like myself are never outside in colourful places like a local market. The noise of people shouting, pushing as they are rushing by; and all of the smells feel overpowering, almost annoying.

As I walk towards the middle of the market hall, I hear something strange. Someone is crying. Does nobody else seem to hear her? Why is nobody helping? I start walking towards an older lady, sitting in the middle of the market hall, on the ground, sobbing. People walk by as if they cannot notice anything. Just hearing her cries makes me feel weak and exhausted. As I walk closer, her cries are becoming softened and by the time I reach her, she is standing and smiling. What has just happened? I feel immense sadness and confusion. As I approach her, I say ‘hi’ but no voice leaves my mouth. Her face becomes stiff and frozen into a grin, the world around us comes to a still and falls completely silent. The only thing I feel is overwhelming sadness and for a moment, I think my heart will break, shatter and leave my body. But just then, when the moment starts to become unbearable, a man puts his hand on my shoulder and calmness comes over me. The market seems normal again, people move around, the hustle and bustle continue, the elderly lady takes a step back and then starts talking to a buyer in a screeching voice, offering her some pears from her stand. The man is still standing next to me and looks at me slightly worried. I also see disapproval in his eyes which have a special shine to them. A type of gaze with a soft, deep shine, which I only see occasionally. He takes his hand off my shoulder and I don’t know what to say to him. I feel embarrassed, as if someone has found out a secret.

Finally, he tells me, ‘Don’t worry! She does this every day. When you are such an easy target, she will steal your joy and peace. She is doing this to everyone around her, but not many can see what is really happening. Most people just hear her talking to them and they think they have a normal exchange, while buying her produce. But she is a thief.’  

Finally, my voice returns to me and as I still star into this man’s eyes, I say ‘Thank you. I don’t understand what happened. What do you mean?’ 

Now he smiles and answers ‘Don’t you know, I see you? There is no need to hide. Come and walk with me! I need to buy some tea’.

I avert his gaze, stay silent and accompany him.  How embarrassing? Someone can spot me in the middle of the crowd, just by sensing the shift of my emotions and shift of energy.  

The man breaks my inner monologue and says ‘This is a lesson for you. You must guard your energy. If you let the thieves so close, just because you feel for them, you won’t have anything left for yourself. Inner stability is underrated. And look at her! She is not really in need at all. In fact, she is gathering all this stolen energy as a hoarder and feeds on it.. disgusting creature.’

As I turn back to look at her, I cannot see the old lady anymore. I see a dark creature, with a scary look on her face. She looks greedy and seems like she is scrounging on snippets of other buyers’ joy and peace around her. We continue walking and I take a quick look at him. His face looks angry for a moment but the emotion passes so quickly that I have no time to delve into it. The next moment, we arrive to a bio shop at the end of the market hall and we enter. The lady at the counter looks divine, her long, silver hair frames her face and falls on her body, reaching her waist. The place smells like a mix of chocolate, vanilla, tea and face powder. She greets us with a smile and seems to know my companion. As I look around, I see a grey cat sitting in the corner, eyeing some of the organic cat food. The whole place seems quotidian and relaxing. My newly found friend picks up a big package and we are already leaving.

As we reach outside of the little store, he hands me a small pack of tea and tells me ‘I see your are at peace now. Drink this! It will help you regain your joy too. I need to leave now. Guard yourself better!’, and he smiles. His eyes sparkle and I feel calm and in balance. I thank him but before I have time to say anything else, he is already disappearing from my view.

As I walk home, I still think about these encounters.

When I am at home, drinking my tea, charging with joy, thinking of the starry eyes… nobody can steal my peace anymore.